Healed... but Damaged >;
- just me
- Jan 20, 2017
- 2 min read
I am quite vocal at times about child abuse. Particularly because I am a product of it.
I come from a family of five children. I was the only one that had the worst wrath of my mother. Oh, don't get me wrong, she had a temper on her. Not sure if its sadly or fortunately but I stood my ground and wanted to be heard. For that I paid the price.
One thing for sure, I have my mothers strength, and my fathers sense of humor. Which is probably why I survived seemingly unscathed. I say seemingly very lightly. Largely due to going from a mentally and physically abusive mother to a mentally abusive husband for all of nine years.
Sucker for punishment it sounds like to me. I have a wonderful survival instinct, which is why I am still here today. I came close a couple of times, don't get me wrong.
I am in a wonderful relationship with a fabulous husband. Sadly, at times I find that I become insecure and just sad when things go wrong. I often wonder if that is a product of insecurity and lack of self worth from my childhood. I physically have to have a talk with myself to lift out of the blues. It is not an easy feat, and I often fail to make it happen quickly.
What I do find helps is just to talk about stuff. Not necessarily the hurt, but just interact with your friends. Even just being friendly to others seems to lift my spirits.
The scars of abuse will probably never go away. But darned if I will ever let it get the better of me.
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